One Day Before Santa
Just one more day to go — one more rendition of “Santa Claus is Coming to Town,” just one more “How many days left, mom?,” just one more shake of the snow globe.
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My Girl’s Spirit
Telling off Santa
I never saw it coming — my little 6-year-old, sweet as can be, full of life and laughter — that my daughter would take out Santa Claus. But she did. And how. Approaching Santa, my daughter asked him a question in Spanish, at which point he was unable to answer. And when he did with something like, “HO! LA!” she called him out. Full-stop.
Looking over at the hoopla, I saw my girl, hand on one hip, pointing with the other, giving Santa a talk. “You are a FAKE!,” she told him. “Santa knows every language in the world of every child in the world and you can’t even understand me!” Then, with all the conviction in the world, “You are a faker, faker, baker.”
I tried to stop her, but there was little I could do. A girl on a mission is unstoppable. I feebly asked her to sit on Santa’s lap and tell him what she wanted for Christmas. In response she said, “If you know when I am sleeping and know when I’m awake. If you know when I’ve been bad or good, then how do you not know what I want for Christmas?” Shit. Score one for the first grader.
Eventually I got her to sit on Santa’s lap. She did it under protest, and only after I conceded that she was right, the Macy’s dude was not Santa.
As we left, he called her back and gave her a tiny pin. She snorted and said, “Santa gives candycanes, not pins. And anyway, your beard is too short.”
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When You Wish Upon a Star…
… your son comes out on to the back porch to ask you what you’re doing.
And, when you tell your 6-year-older that you’re wishing on a star (which, I actually do every night),
…he’ll tell you that you’re not wishing on a star. And he’ll say,
“Mom, that’s not a star. You’re not wishing on a star, you’re wishing on Neptune, which is easily confused with the Morning Star or the Evening Star. It’s okay, a lot of people do it.”
… and you smile.
And tell your boy to find a “real star” to wish on.
And he does.
And we do.
And my wish has already come true.
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Side Gigs
